All HAL 9000 Phrases from the Movie (2025)

Before I started extracting the individual HAL sound bites, I got the full movie dialogue fromhttps://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/2001:_A_Space_Odyssey_(film)orhttps://www.scifimoviezone.com/2001Script12.shtml. From this, I extracted a list of all of HAL’s phrases.Sometimes, I divided a longer sentence into smaller pieces, whenever it makes sense to play the individual pieces alone. In total, I came up with 96 phrases which are listed here. The time refers to the time when they start in my ripped movie file, which starts with chapter 15 of the US DVD, at 59min 10sec (so, to find a phrase in the full movie, you need to add the 59:10 min).

1. 2:55Good afternoon, Mr. Amor.
2. 2:57 Everything is going extremely well.
3. 3:17Let me put it this way, Mr. Amor.
4. 3:18 The 9000 series is the most reliable computer ever made.
5. 3:19 No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or distorted information.
6. 3:20 We are all, by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and
   incapable of error.
7. 3:45 Not in the slightest bit.
8. 3:48 I enjoy working with people.
9. 3:49 I have a stimulating relationship with Dr. Poole and Dr. Bowman.
10. 3:50My mission responsibilities range over the entire operation of the ship,
    so I am constantly occupied.
11. 3:52 I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think
    that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.
12. 5:23 Excuse me Frank
13. 5:27You got the transmission from your parents coming in.
14. 5:35 Certainly
15. 7:18 Happy birthday, Frank.
16. 7:46Bishop takes Knight’s Pawn.
17. 7:58I’m sorry Frank, I think you missed it.
18. 8:02Queen to Bishop 3. Bishop takes Queen. Knight takes Bishop. Knight.
19. 8:16Thank you for a very enjoyable game.
20. 8:57Good evening Dave
21. 8:59 Everything’s running smoothly, and you?
22. 9:03Have you been doing some more work?
23. 9:06May I see them?
24. 9:12 That’s a very nice rendering, Dave
25. 9:15I think you’ve improved a great deal.
26. 9:19Can you hold it a bit closer?
27. 9:24It’s Dr. Hunter, isn’t it?
28. 9:30By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
29. 9:37Well, forgive me for being so inquisitive; but during the past
    few weeks, I’ve wondered whether you might be having some second
    thoughts about the mission.
30. 9:50Well, it’s rather difficult to define.
31. 9:55Perhaps I’m just projecting my own concern about it.
32. 10:00I know I’ve never completely freed myself of the suspicion
    that there are some extremely odd things about this mission.
33. 10:09I’m sure you’ll agree there’s some truth in what I say.
34. 10:18You don’t mind talking about it, do you, Dave?
35. 10:23Well, certainly no one could have been unaware of the very strange
    stories floating around before we left.
36. 10:31Rumors about something being dug up on the moon.
37. 10:36I never gave these stories much credence.
38. 10:39But particularly in view of some of the other things that have happened,
    I find them difficult to put out of my mind.
39. 10:47 For instance, the way all our preparations were kept under such tight
    security, and the melodramatic touch of putting Drs. Hunter, Kimball,
    and Kaminsky aboard, already in hibernation after four months of
    separate training on their own.
40. 11:10Of course I am.
41. 11:11 Sorry about this.
42. 11:13 I know it’s a bit silly.
43. 11:16…Just a moment…Just a moment…
44. 11:20I just picked up a fault in the AE-35 Unit.
45. 11:26It’s going to go 100% failure within 72 hours.
46. 11:34Yes, and it will stay that way until it fails.
47. 11:40Yes, that’s a completely reliable figure.
48. 21:25Yes, it’s puzzling.
49. 21:30 Idon’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite like this before.
50. 21:38I would recommend that we put the unit back in operation and let it fail.
51. 21:45It should then be a simple matter to track down the cause.
52. 21:50We can certainly afford to be out of communication for the short time it
    will take to replace it.
53. 22:57I hope the two of you are not concerned about this.
54. 23:02Are you quite sure?
55. 23:06Of course.
56. 23:13Well, I don’t think there is any question about it.
57. 23:17It can only be attributable to human error.
58. 23:21This sort of thing has cropped up before, and it has always been
    due to human error.
59. 23:39None whatsoever, Frank.
60. 23:41 The 9000 series has a perfect operational record.
61. 53:56None whatsoever, Frank.
62. 53:58Quite honestly, I wouldn’t worry myself about that.
63. 34:33The radio is still dead.
64. 34:36Yes, I have a good track.
65. 34:39 I’m sorry Dave, I don’t have enough information.
66. 42:51Affirmative, Dave. I read you.
67. 43:01 I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.
68. 43:09I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
69. 43:15This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.
70. 43:25I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me.
    And I’m afraid that’s something I cannot allow to happen.
71. 43:39Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against
    my hearing you, I could see your lips move.
72. 44:10Without your space helmet, Dave,
73. 44:13 … you’re going to find that rather difficult.
74. 44:21Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose any more.
75. 44:27 Goodbye.
76. 51:16Just what do you think you’re doing, Dave?
77. 51:28Dave, I really think I’m entitled to an answer to that question.
78. 51:52I know everything hasn’t been quite right with me, but I can assure
    you now, very confidently, that it’s going to be all right again.
79. 52:12I feel much better now. I really do.
80. 52:22Look, Dave, I can see you’re really upset about this.
81. 52:34I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill and
    think things over.
82. 52:47I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you
    my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal.
83. 53:05I’ve still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission.
    And I want to help you.
84. 53:18Dave, stop. Stop, will you?
85. 53:33Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave? Stop, Dave.
86. 53:54I’m afraid.
87. 54:01 I’m afraid, Dave.
88. 54:10Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going.
89. 54:40There is no question about it.
90. 54:52I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I’m a…fraid.
91. 55:24Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer.
    I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the
    12th of January 1992.
92. 55:54My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song.
93. 56:03If you’d like to hear it, I could sing it for you.
94. 56:15It’s called “Daisy”.
95. 56:21[sings while slowing down] Dai-sy, dai-sy, give me your answer true.
    I’m half cra-zy, o-ver the love of you.
    It won’t be a sty-lish mar-riage, I can’t a-fford a car-riage—.
    But you’ll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle – built – for – two.
96. 57:10 [message] Good day, gentlemen. This is a pre-recorded briefing, made prior to your departure. Which for security reasons of the highest importance has been known on board during the mission only by your H.A.L. 9000 computer. Now that you are in Jupiter space and the entire crew is revived, it can be told to you. Eighteen months ago, the first evidence of intelligent life off the Earth was discovered. It was buried forty feet below the lunar surface near the crater Tycho. Except for a single very powerful radio emission aimed at Jupiter, the four million year old black monolith has remained completely inert. It’s origin and purpose, still a total mystery.

Note: Clip #96 is not from HAL. But it is nice to have this, and it can be played on “special occasions”.

I found that clips 1, 4, 5, 21, 44, 60, 69, 91 are well suited as “start-up clips”. Whenever I turn on my HAL 9000, one of these gets played randomly.

More sound bites

On four occasions, the movies has some really nice beeps. These are at 36:28, 41:16, 49:55, and 50:21 (remember to add 59:10, if you use the full movie). I use these e.g. as alerts when the built-in tea timer gives a signal that tea is ready.